Self Care. The petrol in your engine.
Self care you say? Isn’t that some kind of weird “Woo Woo” thing? Y’know for ‘those’ kind of people?
Well I for one am going to answer yes to all of the above, but before you dismiss me as one of ‘those’ kind of people, hear me out a little. You see I’m a frazzled mum to 3 gorgeous but gobby teenagers. CEO to an increasingly busy household, cook, cleaner, washer, shopper, fridge replenisher, dog walker, finder of all things lost, agony aunt, financial advisor and general fixer of all situations.
I take my friendships seriously. So if we’re good mates and you need me, then I’m there. Be that to join you in the odd (purely supportive) glass of wine; dance on tables, assist on a ‘secret mission’ or be a shoulder for you to cry on when times are crap, then we can do it together.
Add to that growing, loving and running a business that specialises in coaching women; working on mindset and developing potential. A love of crazy outdoor activities and a full on bonkers, extended family living a distance away and I’m beginning to feel more than a little sick at the speed this merry-go-round of life is spinning me.
Over dosing on life is quite a common thing these days isn’t it? We set out to achieve monumental tasks in superhuman periods of time. Failing isn’t an option. We inhale information, via smart phones and social media, expecting immediate response and making ourselves available to anybody at any time of any day. We talk about diet, fitness and detoxing and add them to our to-do list as tasks rather than life style priorities and wonder why we reach weekends and holiday periods feeling as though we’re already hung over, without touching a drop of alcohol.
Now untapped and untempered, these crappy feelings persist. They multiply and grow. At their most serious, they cause depression, anxiety and perhaps breakdown. I know you can see where I’m headed with this…..
But for most of us, we just lug the over load of everyone else’s life along with our own baggage. Never stopping to question what this is doing to us. As women, we pride ourselves on having strength, grit and determination. For being stoic, able to solve all problems at all times. But I need to ask… WHAT ABOUT YOU? Where do you fit in this spaghetti tangle of life? Who is making sure that you are ok? Who is your 3am friend? And, more to the point, how the fuck are you going to give all this amazing care to all these people, cos I know that your life is absolutely no different to mine, if you are permanently knackered?
Surely these people are marvellous? Surely you adore them and want to give the very best of everything you have? And in return, don’t they deserve the best of you; not some exhausted cranky hag who has little time or energy and is on the brink of exhaustion?
Taking time out from your life, to refuel, recharge, reset, whatever you want to call it, isn’t a luxury, it’s a total essential. You can not give water from an empty well. Your levels need to be topped up way above minimum before you are able to nurture anyone else… nobody likes the dregs right?
Go for a walk, get your nails done, read a book, just sit in the garden. Or maybe indulge a little more; a spa break, a weekend away… Or maybe just a lie in, in clean crisp sheets, with a cup of tea.
Self care isn’t “woo woo.” It’s bloody essential. It’s the petrol to fuel your engine. And am I one of ‘those kind of people? Of course I am!